Kindness costs nothing but means everything
All of our lives are better when we fill it with kindness.
After noodling, my two rules I’ve come up with are:
- Always be kind and do so immediately
- React to kindness with more kindness
Rule #1 – Always be kind and do so immediately
Peter Kauffman gave one of my favorite ever speeches in The Multidisciplinary Approach to thinking. Learning from multiple disciplines his takeaway is “Go positive and go first, and be constant in doing it”
- Being kind to others causes them to be kind to us (mirrored reciprocation)
- Doing this constantly results in a self-replicating feedback loop (compounding)
Meditation teacher Joseph Goldstein has the best practical application as he says whenever you think of something kind, do it immediately. If you remember a friend has a birthday and loves coffee, send him a Starbucks card. If you like a colleague’s dress but you don’t know them well, go out of your way to tell her it’s beautiful.
Whenever you are on the fence, put yourself out there and choose kindness to others. You’ll be surprised how wonderful the world is as a result.
Rule # 2- React to kindness with more kindness
Building on the concept of compounding, we should similarly react to kindness with more kindness.
My simple trick is to say “thank you and I appreciate you” whenever someone goes out of their way for me.
- I used to struggle with accepting gifts, but now I focus on the love in each gift.
- My friend took time out of their day and paid money to show me how much they care about me. What could be more wonderful!?!
- It’s my duty to tell them how much I treasure their thoughtfulness and how that love and kindness means the world to me.
Letting others know how they’re making a positive impact in my life makes them feel great and makes it more likely to continue.
Taken together these two rules create positive feedback loops (pun intended) and a truly wonderful world to live in!!