Parenting Conflicts

My son isn’t even a year old and I’m already confused. I’d been prepared for the first year of dirty diapers and interrupted nights, but I hadn’t thought enough about our family values and the tradeoffs we will face. 

I’m hoping to instill in my son 

1. Curiosity 
2. Independence 
3. Humility 

But what do I do when those come into conflict? 

I’ve learned more from a one week trip to Latin America than 3 years of Spanish class. I want my son to be exposed to experiences early to build his curiosity, yet I don’t want to spoil him with fancy trips so the bar is raised so high that a Ritz in the Caribbean isn’t stunning to him.  

Reflecting on this, I’ve thought kids will learn what you model. You can’t have a butler and expect your kid to eat at Mcdonald’s; and the way to counteract spoiling my son is to not spoil myself. If I want him to learn to explore and be curious then I need to both explore with him and give him the freedom to choose his own adventures. 

My current motto is “visit Paris, but in a two star hotel” and my evolving lessons are:

1. Travel anywhere, but never the 5 star experience 
2. Fly coach 
3. No fancy cars (we don’t need a Porsche anyway) 
4. Occasionally make an effort to rough it (ex: camping) 

Parenting is a journey and I feel like I still barely know what I’m doing. When conflicts emerge though, I’m hoping my lessons come not from perfect ready made answers, but from thoughtful questions applied to my context.