My ideal house

Where we live determines more about our life than almost any other decision. Who we meet, what we do, and how we think are all shaped by it.  

Since I haven’t purchased a house yet, here are my constantly evolving thoughts on where I’d want to live so I can compare this when I do make a decision

Broad neighborhood criteria 

1. Friendly Neighborhood
   • Goal – Maximize interaction with neighbors. The more you can see neighbors, the more it’ll feel like a home in a community 
   • What I’m looking for
     1. More front yards = better as easy to strike a conversation
     2. Sidewalks → more walking/talking to each other
     3. Curved streets and cul-de-sacs slow down drivers and maximize interaction 
     4. Hedges/fences blocking views block you off from your community 
2. Walkability/Density
   • Goal – Could you spend a fulfilling weekend without driving? What shared spaces exist in the area? 
   • What I’m looking for
     1. Safe and easy to ride a bike/walk to places
     2. Local park within a 10 minute walk. Ideally multiple
     3. Local coffee shop within a 10 min walk
     4. Mixed use areas nearby (plaza, stores, restaurants, etc) facilitate interactions and promote safety 
     5. Are there common spaces where people hang out together outside and you’d run into them? Cafe/restaurants, BBQs, pools, etc. 
3. Nature accessible
   • Goal – stay connected to the world
   • What I’m looking for
     1. Maximize tree cover 
     2. How many animals could you see in a 15 minute walk from home?
     3. Benefits of nature described in the comfort crisis and twenty minutes of nature three times a week drops stress/cortisol levels

And now a few specifics about the ideal house for my wife and me. We almost inevitably won’t be able to maximize all of these

House specifics 

1. Small-medium house
   • Goal – Enough space to live with a family together, but not more  
   • 2-3K square feet
   • 3-5 bedrooms 
   • 2-4 bathrooms
   • In the Art of gathering, Priya Parker describes how only 12 square feet is needed per person to host a party so a small house with 600 square foot common spaces can still easily host a 50 person party
2. No renovations required → pay more for ready as is house
3. Nearby schools
   • 10 min or less walk to elementary school 
   • 5 min less or drive to high school
4. Strong natural light
   • South facing 
   • Large windows
5. Common space
   • Front yard or “picket fence” you can see over 
   • Porch or screened in porch
6. Cooking kitchen
   • Enough storage and counter space 
   • Preferably island 
7. Cozy bathroom
   • Two sinks in primary bathroom 
   • Bath in bathroom
8. If townhome
   • Minimize stairs 
   • Within 5 min walk of park 
   • Premiums on townhome are acceptable if across from a park as that’s effectively a front yard that you don’t pay to upkeep

And then when we do buy a house we want to be disciplined. Here’s our recently discussed approach.

Buying Process

1. Live/rent in area for 12 months minimum before buying any house 
2. Buy a house when confident we’ll be in that area for 5+ years 
3. Go to 20+ open houses before making first offer
4. Spend 24 hours minimum after seeing a house before making an offer
   1. “If too slow then market too hot”
5. Be diligent house is right fit
   1. Only make an offer after you’ve toured a house in person 
   2. Never waive an inspection 
6. Put down 20% minimum up front
   1. Higher if possible. Preference up to 50%

This isn’t “financially efficient”, but as Morgan Housel describes in the Psychology of Money it’s better to be reasonable than purely financially rational and this will help us stress less and sleep better at night